Being very much a novice in this blogging thing, until inshaalllah I develop some better technical skills, I think. I am not sure how to do too much yet which I am sure is terribly uninteresting to the reader...I'm learning..!
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SISTERHOOD IN ISLAM
Means more than just nodding and saying "salaams" to muslimahs you see in your city. It means taking care to tend to the other needs of sisters in the best of your abilities. And, certainly we can always do more of this, at times we are so consumed with what needs to be done in our life that we forget those outside or immediate family and friends.
I went to a new masjid or mosque the other day and while the were a ton of brothers (we were obviously in seperate spots but I heard and saw a few of them when I entered), there were not so many sisters. Many of them were older ones, but even the young ones only said "hi" to their friends. Only one greeted me and at that- only when were were stuck waiting in the same area. But come on- new sister in the community should be welcomed, hugged and greeted as family. At least introduce yourself to them and reach out in a clear way, even if you are shy. WHen you do this, Allaah smiles. It's like you're acknowledging one of his flock, but when you don't you are by passing the very important needs of someone new/unsure/nervous in the area, needs that are satisfied with a simple "Hello and welcome, what is your name. Please come again..." This does soooo incredibly much, its selfish not to do it, regardless of if you are "shy" or an introvert, it's not even about you at that moment, its about doing dawah.
The other thing that is nice to remember is support. Support those sisters around you, engage in halaqa or religious educational circles. I created one with a friend back in Nairobi but unfortunately there were issues that I'd advise you guys to avoid:
-there were some of us with very busy career schedules who HAPPENED to be located far away
Agree on a set location that is central, only one of us had a car (the rest depended on someone else. Me, on my mom for example)
A local park can be used for example, and think what a beautiful site that would be, Subhanallah, a bunch of sisters in brightly coloured hijab, all clustered on the grass to happily talk about their religion.
-Engage in discipline, keeping a schedule, mark days ahead on which you'll meet. The days and actual timings of these events should be convenient for everyone so that attendance rates will be constant and high.
-It is a sweet idea- and this is how "ours" worked, to give each person in the group a day on the calender to plan a discussion topic. Topics can be brainstormed together and then sisters can individually select ones that strike their interest. I find this really empowering because it completely involves everyone, people pay more attention even when they aren't the ones chairing a discussion, because they know that their own time to chair will come up and they are watching for ideas, 'how does this sister present her topic,' use of ahadith, and stories...I find it empowering to give others a chance. Group loyalty rates are also a lot higher when people feel their input is really valid and respected.
Other fun things are field trips to new or even somewhat far away Islamic shops. All the sisters can go to a fabric shop and buy material for new hijabs. Go to a bookstore together and buy religious or spiritual books to which a secondary "bookclub" event can be organized.
Outings are so much fun and so often, in an unislamic society they are all about "getting drinks," clubbing, houseparties or whatnot where you know that you will be compromising your beliefs. So, step up- organize your own halal and sister themed outings that you'll realize are even MORE FUN:
-A high tea lunch with discussion that follows
-A movie or lecture night but down sleepover/movie night style with lots of snacks, pillows, blankets, boardgames, pyjamas...
-In our group, we would each get out a pad of paper and make a list of things to pray about, the needs in the community and of the sisters. During Ramadan we would specialize on ONE need of each sister, and after salaah we would always remember those needs of our sisters.
-Get matching/Order online matching Islamic coffee mugs or sleeper t-shirts to form a group feeling of unity. Doing the same clothing can be cheesy to people, lol especially if you all want to wear it on the same day...But to each her own, there are a myriad of things that you can do to make your sister's group special.
-For an even deeper level, one a month plan a "families" dinner in which kids and husbands can get to know eachother and befriend.
-Do a meal for the poor or at risk in society, organize giving canned goods (if funds are low, these can be collected over a period of time and then given out later on) to homeless shelters or charity events. Let people know that this is "from the muslim sisters..." how touched they'll be..
Anyway, I am sure you get the point by now- HAH! But, other examples on how sisterhood/dawah can be practiced is:
- If there is a sister in the community who is suffering somehow, either she is sick or depressed or having family/personal problems, reach out! Visit her at her convenience with a potluck dinner.
- If she is to get married, organize a "halal" and somewhat islamically themed bachlorette party, we did. It rocked!
- If there is a sister who is down on her luck or whose deen is on the decline, ask her to spend the night or spend the night with her. Make arrangements and spend the whole night gabbing--inspire her, let her know she is so special to the community and you welcome her back or need what she has to offer.
- Visit unrelated muslims who are sick in the hospital. Bring them food, books and feed them love.
- If there is a new muslim family or individual in the community, send them a welcome card on behalf of the entire community with the masjid's name and address if they have not yet been.
Basically, there is a whole lot that you can do-hundreds, thousands, MILLION actually and often very little that is done for and by sisters. So, I really challenge you guys to engage in and create new events and opportunities to reach out to people, let them know they matter and you will be amazed at the response. Alhamdulilah, most of it SUPER AMAZINGLY, benefits you the most, there is a fullness in your swelling heart that you'll feel.
It is so wonderful to recieve, but so much more wonderful to give. So, give back to a sister that helped you at one point in time. Send her a thank you note, a small gift (candle, book,sweet) and let her know she matters. Ask your local masjid's imam what the community needs, often you will find that there are very many unsatisfied needs to which response is needed. In doing so, wallahi you will find yourself happier and your life fuller.
Give it a try.
xxxx
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